The Fairer Sex EP

by Vinny Peculiar

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Vinny Peculiar

'The Fairer Sex' EP

Release Date 17.2.17

Format Digital: All Platforms

The Fairer Sex EP, four songs linked by gender ...

‘I Came Back As A Girl’, is an identity switching fantasy of reincarnation, a transitional re awakening...

‘House of Girls’ from the webcams of desire to the Jacuzzi's of the absurd with Hefner, String-fellow and the usual suspects...

‘No Reply’ a gentle plaintive piano ballad, simply sadness loss and resignation...

‘Trial by Lingerie’ a light hearted look at male humiliation in an M&S Lingerie department...oh dear

'if there’s a more underrated (read cult) quality UK songwriter out there then we have yet to hear them' IRISH TIMES


released February 17, 2017

Written by Alan Wilkes aka Vinny Peculiar
Recorded at Whitby Studios, Ellesmere Port with Ian Lewis
Mixed by Vinny Peculiar
Mastered by Dave Marsden

Vinny Peculiar - Main Voice, Guitars, Keys,
Paul Tsanos - Drums, Backing Vocals
Bobby Kewley - Bass, Backing vocals
Rob Steadman - Keys, Backing Vocals
Maaike Ghijsels - Backing Vocals



all rights reserved


Vinny Peculiar Worcester, UK

Vinny Peculiar variously described as – ‘An under sung national treasure’ [UNCUT Magazine 2014] – a warm hearted Morrissey [Q Magazine 2014] and the missing link between Jarvis Cocker and Roger McGough [Irish Times 2014]. THE ROOT MULL AFFECT is a compilation -
‘The missing link between Jarvis Cocker and poet Roger McGough and some of the wittiest lyrics this side of Wreckless Eric’ IRISH TIMES
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Track Name: I Came Back As A Girl
I Came Back As a Girl

They said I was no more
Said I’d been and gone
My time was all over
All over and done

My star had faded out
Out of time and out of space
But I returned
To restart the race

Swore it was the end of the world
But I came back
Back as a girl
Sugar and spice and all things nice

My hands were tiny
You said they were good for porn…not that I ever did any
My heart was big
My soul reborn

I tasted of pear drops and strawberry lip-gloss
My shoes were stacked up high
I couldn’t read maps
But I would try I’d try…oh how I’d try

Swore it was the end of the world
But I came back
Back as a girl
Sugar and spice and all things nice

I could be devious
I could be serious
I could be cruel and I could be oh so imperious
Oh so mischievous

I shopped until I dropped
So easily I cried
At Sleepless in Seattle and the one about the virgin bride…yeah I loved that one

I grew my hair
I grew my nails I got a
Dolphin tattoo

No one believed me when I said
The real me is dead
They thought I’d lost my head…they thought I’d lost it

Swore it was the end of the world
But I came back
Back as a girl
Sugar and spice and all things nice

Back in extra time
Back in the firing line
Back on the town with Jeff and Dave
Were going to the pub and to the rave

I’m dancing my life away
Will it always be this way?

I don’t know
I just don’t know…I just don’t know

I came back as a girl
Track Name: House Of Girls
House of Girls

Little Rachel plays the queen of hearts
And pirouettes like Darcy
Slips into her baby dolls and saucy lingerie
Dearest Tristan on the web cam says
He just loves to watch a pretty girl moan
Care to join him in the holidays
He says he’ll make see you feel at home

He’s in the house of girls

Jeff the tycoon and his PA Sue
Go dancing on the old shag pile
I want to do it all night long she says
Lionel Richie style
I truly missed you in the holidays
LA reeks of sweat and aerosol gas
So glad you’re here baby get me a beer
And then I’ll let you kiss my

You can kiss me…

Peter loves the new Jacuzzi
Makes a toast and takes a happy pill
Here’s to my little angel
Here’s to you my gorgeous little angel…still

There are mirrors on the ceiling
Condoms on the shelf by the door
Every single night it’s a gentlemen’s delight
And you can hardly ask for more

Precious trinkets from the Middle East
How wonderful so kind…
There’s something here you really have to try
And its going to blow your tiny mind, oh yes

Its gonna blow your tiny miiiiind…..

In the house of girls
We’re in the house of girls
Hundreds of girls
Thousands of girls
Track Name: No Reply
Theres comes a time of no reply
There comes a time to say goodbye
And now the time is here
Goodbye my love my dear

Never mind the hurt and the cruel regrets
Nor the bitter tears we shed
Put the photographs away for another rainy day to come
In April

It doesn't matter how far I move away
Part of me will be with you forever
I know it sounds absurd but I wish that I could stay
In your loving arms forever

But I don't want to be your new best friend
So I can never see you again
Theres nothing more to add
I'm just so very sad


Just so very sad

Track Name: Trial By Lingerie
Trial by Lingerie

She needed some new underwear
So after the cinema
We went to the Trafford Centre
Found ourselves in
Marks and Spencer
These will do the trick she said…nice

I say the thong seems to have given way to something altogether more rounded?
The Brazilian she said
That’s what the new shape is called

Oh …

I thought that was something to do with shaving I say, a little too smugly – no reaction

Some ten minutes later she’s paying at the counter at the front of the queue when she shouts across the shop floor
‘Can you just bring me another size 12 in the black?’
‘They’re on offer, thanks’…

I return to the briefs and bras section but in haste get all confused and start to panic, I can’t find them, I’m going round in circles, bras and knickers, briefs and stockings I am overwhelmed, overcome…

At this point the women in the queue all turn around, they too are looking at me like I’m on trial, on trial by lingerie

Oh dear…

We have further words and this time she’s raised her voice, ‘I can see them from here’ - she rolls her eyes and leaves the queue, marches towards me and duly identifies the required knickers giving them a little wave in the air signalling success, result!

Out of the corner of my eye I can see other women in the queue smiling, nudge nudging, wink winking, and collectively groaning ‘men egh

I have behaved to type, and they know it, and I know it…

I apologize

The girl at the till is patient and polite
It’s easy to get confused she says a little too sweetly
It happens all the time

The store is closing
We say goodbye

Do you mind if I go to HMV I say?
Only if you promise to be quick is the reply…

Trial by lingerie
I’m on trial by lingerie